Eh, I’ll give it a try. Paul Downing will be answering the questions.
If the internet became sentient?
“Ah, well, I’d be indifferent. I would still ask the internet concerning questions with little to no issue.”
If their home/living space/immediate area was flooded by possibly radioactive water?
“How will I explain this to the landlord…?”
If a truly terrible person was going to be in charge, creating laws to oppress certain groups of people, which may include your OC?
“Um, I would most likely be unaffected. I am, well appear to be, a white male to most. I apparently “beam privilege”…but an assassination will be in order no less.”
If a random person came up to them and smacked them for no apparent reason?
[*Cuts to Paul, dirtied, bloodied, and limping, hauling a body to an industrial-sized trash compactor late at night *]
If they, through an accident or on purpose, did something terrible to a random person?
“I would apologize and hope the best for them. Unless I didn’t like them.”
If they were offered a million dollars to participate in a dangerous, yet rewarding experiment? (like,it finds the cure for cancer but might give you cancer)
“Humanity is already, pardon my mouth, fucked. I will only, pardon me again, fuck it up much worse.”
If a cute smol child with no memory appeared at their (figurative or literal) doorstep?
“Sorry, young one. I happen to be much too busy already caring for a loved one and Jane to adopt you. But, I happen to know a great orphanage/adoption center place nearby that’ll clean you up and get you a new home in no time.”
If their refrigerator (or equivalent convenient item) was broken? By a potted cactus that fell out of nowhere?
"…You put the cookie dough on the pan, ready to bake and next thing you know, your oven is broken and a cactus is on the floor."
If someone came up to them and said they were a wizard? (Bonus points if the OC’s name is already Harry. Like 10b points.) “You must be one of James’s friends.”
If someone told them their world wasn’t real? Or that there are other worlds?
“Sounds cool. I’m not denying it or anything. I’m just saying it sounds cool.”
(I felt I did so baaaad at this. aaaaaaaaaaaa-)